Sledging

OUR research assistants have recently pointed us in the direction of a thread on the NEPL Forum regarding the leading exponents of the dying art of sledging. Sledging according to the column's definition is 'exchanging words with opposition player(s) which can put him (them) off their usual game; it is an attempt to "psych out" an opponent'. We feel we should add that in our humble opinion it should also be humorous which requires the 'sledger' to have a modicum of intelligence and generous supply of wit. Far be it from us to regale our reader with stories of how it was in the good old days, however it is suffice for the column to say that we don't believe calling an opponent by a four letter name requires a great deal of intelligence and entails even less wit.

Notwithstanding our opinions one of the best 'sledges' the column has been privy to hear in recent years took place at Burnhope during the 2003 season. Picture the scene. The North East Durham League Representative team are batting against the full might of the North East Premier League Representative XI - or at least the full might who could be bothered to play at Burnhope. Richard Waite of Stockton is bowling at one end and Stephen Gale then of Chester le Street is bowling at the other. The ball is turning square and the North East Durham League batsmen are having difficulty laying a bat on it. One of the North East Durham League batsman turns to the slip fielders and says,

"We don't have any bowlers like this in our league."

First slip, who shall remain nameless except to say that at the time he was playing for Chester le Street before moving to Gateshead Fell and then to Blaydon replies,

"No mate and we don't have any batsman like you in ours either!"

A sharp response that required a modicum of wit although the column will refrain from making comments regarding the individual's intelligence.

We have also heard - several times at least - of a similar type of incident which took place one night at Annfield Plain when the 'great' Gateshead Fell side of the nineties came to town. The difference on this occasion was that the 'sledging' came from outside the field of play.

The tale goes that the legendary Doug Hudson was bowling to Annfield Plain's Bruce Armstrong, who to use cricketing parlance kept 'carting' him over mid wicket into someone's garden. The householder was none other than former IBF World Cruiser Weight Champion Glen McCrory. McCrory, who had recently built a new conservatory, was quite rightly concerned about one of Armstrong's blows shattering one of his newly installed panes and eventually took to fielding at 'cow corner' albeit ten yards beyond the boundary line and on his lawn. Unfortunately for the hapless Douglas the onslaught continued and it was then that McCrory decided it was high time to throw in the towel.

"Tell the captain to get the fat bastard off from bowling!" he shouted.

"I am the captain" responded the fat bastard.

Armstrong's onslaught continued and the rest, as they say, is history.